Benjamin and Lauren Turner
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Peanut

7/10/2012

 
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The technician's diagnosis: "You're definitely pregnant."

With an acrobat, apparently.  You would not believe the maneuvers we watched this peanut do.  Flips, somersaults, and a lot of kicking and waving.

The age by measurement is about 10 weeks, 6 days.  Technically, we're only at 10 weeks 3 days, so this is good news.  There were no signs in the preliminary reading of anything unusual or abnormal.  My bloodwork has all come back with excellent reports, we've picked up the baby's heartbeat three times, and now we have some nice black and white pictures.

We're being told repeatedly, "Looks like a nice normal pregnancy.  Have a nice day!"

All of which means...the little weird things that happened were just little weird things and no indication this time of an impending miscarriage.  God has not only blessed us with a strong little peanut, but given us overwhelming evidence to prove he has.

Hospital policy is to exclude everyone from the ultrasound room except the patient and that was making me pretty uneasy.  I really didn't want to do the ultrasound without Ben there, but hospitals have a way of sticking to policies even when you beg.  When they called me in and told Ben to stay behind, I broke from my usual meek habit of following the rules and said, "Isn't there any way he can come in too?"

"I'm sorry, that's the policy," the nurse said.  "You can talk to the technician, but we don't let anyone in and for now you'll have to go wait in the other waiting room."

So there I sat, off in a little waiting room while Ben was left in the main room.  I was pretty nervous by then (not a good combination with morning sickness and a stomach full of water...) and when I looked around for something to distract me, I was surprised and thrilled to discover and current copy of Cooking Light sitting on the table.  Nothing distracts me quite as well as indulging my recipe habit.  I found a few good ones and began copying them down on a piece of paper I found in my purse.  As a distraction, it worked pretty well because I got a lot less nervous; something I was very thankful for a little while later when the imaging center's manager beckoned me out into the hall for a conversation.

"I hear you have some family you would really like to bring in for the ultrasound," he said.  He was an older man, and he seemed kind of nervous to be talking to me.

"Yes - I was really hoping my husband could come in too," I said.  "I've had some bad experiences with ultrasounds and I'd feel much better if he were there."

"Would it make any difference if he just sat outside?" he said.  "Because we really don't like anyone else to be in the room while the technician is doing measurements."

"It would be better than nothing," I said.  I kind of brightened up, because Ben sitting just outside the curtain was a lot better than Ben in a waiting room across the building.  At least he'd be right there.

"Now, the reason we have the policy," he explained, "is because sometimes...when family is there...and the technician might make some kind of facial expression or the family member might not understand what's being measured or what's being looked at...things can get kind of unpleasant and people get scared and I would hate for you to have a worse experience than before."

It was funny, but right about then, I knew I could convince him to let Ben in.  All I had to do was be very calm and very reasonable.  So I looked him in the eye and said, "Well, what's happened before is I was present for an ultrasound where my youngest brother was found to have a genetic problem and it was thought at the time he might not even have a brain.  Then with our last baby, we had two ultrasounds where we knew the baby was dead even though no one told us as much.  We were together for those and we were okay for them, but it makes this ultrasound kind of hard for me to do."

He looked at me for a second and said, "I think in this case, we're going to make an exception from the policy."

I think I almost cried.  I said, "Thank you so much.  That is really, really kind of you and I appreciate it."

Later, Ben was waiting for me to use the bathroom (64 ounces of water at once?!!  Yikes!!) and the manager came by.  Ben said, "Thank you so much for letting me be there.  It looks like everything is fine and the baby is healthy."

The manager shook his hand and said.  "Good.  God bless you."

I'm not sure which was the bigger blessing for the day: another diagnosis of "everything is fine" or meeting a man with enough kindness and common sense to let Ben stay with me through the ultrasound.  I was very glad he was there.

And we tried two of the recipes for dinner.  They were both 5-star-keep-in-the-recipe-book ones...though I should probably write them on something more permanent than a two-month-old shopping list.
Emily25069
7/10/2012 12:36:19 pm

I have not ever had an ultrasound that Barry was not allowed in. That is so strange. I did see it was at McLaren Macomb though-and I have not heard such bright and shiny things about that hospital when it comes to birth.

You are still planning a homebirth, right?

Oh! and peanut is gorgeous! Congratulations!

Jill
7/10/2012 02:04:35 pm

HI honey..I had NO idea that you went through this. You said nothing at church. I am so very glad that Ben was finally let in. Little "peanut" is just precious and I'm so excited to see those growing pictures that will come along very soon. My prayers are with both of you and the baby until the wonderful day that "baby" arrives. I love you both. ~J~

Lauren
7/11/2012 05:46:09 am

Emily,

I have no idea why they made the policy, but all I can figure is they must've had one too many problems and finally said, "That's it - everyone out of the pool!" My guess is there was a lawsuit involved somewhere. Still. The insensitivity of it is mind-boggling. I can't be the only mom coming in there with a history of unsettling ultrasounds and to have to lay there on your own without even being able to be able to see the screen...that is not sense.

And yes, we're still hoping to have the baby at home, which is one reason why we were cautious to follow the advice our midwife gave us to check up on things - while we want to be at home, we know it's not the place to be if there's something like a placenta previa, for example. Yikes.

Thanks! I still think the still photo looks a bit like E.T. - Peanut was much more baby-like when actually in motion *chuckle*. I was also very pleased to note beautifully normal ventricles in this shot - those little black ovals near the top of Peanut's head look just as they ought to.

Jill,

*grin* Well, we hadn't gone for the ultrasound yet on Sunday! We just went in yesterday morning, so this picture is only a day old. We didn't know for sure they were going to try to keep Ben out until yesterday when they called me and told Ben, "No, you stay here."

I hate to be disappointing, but I doubt we'll have any more pictures until Peanut actually arrives - at least, I very much hope we won't, because we probably wouldn't go for another ultrasound unless we were checking to see if something was wrong again!

Thank you for the prayers and I love you too!

Kimberly Izzo
7/12/2012 09:29:25 am

Emma and I pray for this little peanut every night! So glad God has answered our prayers for a healthy baby Turner. I'm also happy to hear that they let Ben into the ultrasound. I could not imagine such a special moment without your husband.

Leah J
7/28/2012 12:30:50 pm

Hello Lauren,

My mother-in-law suggested that maybe the fact that the didn't let Ben in with you was simply because you were going in for an ultra-sound to check for a problem. Maybe if you were just going in for a routine unltra-sound they wouldn't have tried to make Ben stay behind.

Anyway, I hope you and Ben are doing well, and we'll talk to you soon. : )

-L

Leah J
7/28/2012 12:31:49 pm

P.S. I like the new format!!

Lauren
8/1/2012 10:32:53 am

I don't think it had anything to do with checking for problems - according to the manager, it's an across-the-board policy and none of the other women in the waiting room were allowed to take anyone in with them either. They don't let anyone in while they're "taking measurements" - they only let family members in after they've finished the active portion of the ultrasound.

So far, I haven't talked to anyone else who's ever been to a hospital that has the same policy. I think it's unique to McLaren.

We're doing well! I have some blog posts I wrote when I didn't have internet access that I'm going to post...wow, that last gap is a long one, though!

Glad you like the new format. ;-)

Talk to you soon!

Lauren
8/1/2012 10:34:07 am

Kim! I missed your comment!

Ben and I (and Baby Turner) appreciate every one of Kim and Emma's prayers. :-))


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    Author: Lauren

    Wife of Benjamin and mother to two wonderful little girls who are getting bigger every day.  Enjoys writing down thoughts and discussions we are having within the family and sharing them with whoever is interested in reading.

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